Yes, my eggo is preggo.
If you know me, you know I love kids. I always have and
always will. That’s probably why I tried to stay one for as long as possible.
What you may not know is that the journey to conceive has
been a rocky one. Thankfully I am not sick and I do not have any severe health
problems. But that was the problem… I am (for the most part) healthy. So why
did it take more than 2 years to conceive?
The bottom line answer: Because God knew the right time in
my life.
The scientific/medical answer: Because I have
hypothyroidism. It’s not serious; however, it does require me to take a pill a
day – every single day. This tiny pill enables my thyroid to work as it should
and produce enough hormones to cause ovulation and sustain a pregnancy. Finding
the right dosage resulted from trial and error.
I am a lucky one. I am well aware and I thank God every day
that hypothyroidism was the answer.
The experience I had trying to conceive opened the door to
an exclusive club of women who have problems conceiving. Some of them know the
medical reasons why and others spend every day wondering. Most of them spend
tons of $ testing to find out. I have been poked with a needle so many times
that I don’t think I have a fear of needles anymore. (Talk about facing your
fears.)
I was and still am amazed at the percentage of women who
have gone through similar experiences as me. No one really talks about it and
there is bit of a stigma.
Unless you have had this experience, you cannot imagine the
emotional rollercoaster you ride. Heartache. Fear. Anxiety. Anger.
Disappointment. At one point or another, I even felt like a lemon – like Marc
picked a dud to marry. The depression I felt sometimes was embarrassing and
exhausting.
I needed a shoulder and some of the ones I leaned on at
first were not in the exclusive club. They didn’t know what I needed and neither
did I. After months of begging, my sister convinced me to tell my Mom. My Mom
has had her turn on the rollercoaster. I finally got what I needed. Comfort. In
only a way that a fellow club member knew I needed, but what a Mom knew she
needed to do for me.
I still worry about losing the baby since it was so hard to
conceive him or her. But like I said, I am a lucky one. I know women who have gone
through and are going through much worse. The emotions I felt and still feel
are just a drop in the bucket.
The most important advice I can give is to pray and talk to
someone.
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