Dear Innocent Husband, Love Ball of Hormones

Dear Innocent Husband,

Because we have come to the conclusion that you cannot read my mind, nor is it fair to punish you for breaking rules before you know what the rules are, I am outlining them for you.

1. If I cry and you don’t know why, just hug me.
2. Just because I am grumpy does not give you permission to be grumpy too. Your job is to cheer me up – not to fuel my fire.
3. If I am stressed out, take a piece of my load (even if it’s cleaning a toilet).
4. Even if I am mad at you, do not defend yourself. Just say you are sorry and hug me. (I know this will be hard.)
5. If I give you a dirty look, do not say, “What’s your problem?” My problem is I am no longer human, I am an incubator.
6. If I did something wrong, keep it to yourself.
7. If I want salsa and chips from Chili’s for the 3^rd time this week, do not sigh and do not complain. Just take me to Chili’s.
8. If you see me looking in the mirror, do not say, “It’s getting bigger.” Just say, “You are beautiful.”
9. If I am quiet and you do not know why. Let me be quiet. I am probably fighting tears. So, just hug me.
10. Although it might be true, never verbally blame any emotions, reactions or moods on the hormones or pregnancy. I can do that. You cannot.

Love,

Ball of Hormones (AKA wife)

P.S. I will add more rules as they come up.